with the course I am studying at university. We finish one week after easter - thats over three grand already spent. I have literally felt like I have learned nothing. Yes, people say the first year is more of an introductory year, but realistically we have been introduced to nothing. If I could rewind time, besides the fact that I’ve met tons of lovely people I’d of never of considered this course. I can’t understand how anyone would actually even feel that this course is good, especially people who really want to take film making seriously! I have filmed barley two projects since starting this year. Projects which were very restrictive in terms of the brief, and not challenging what-so-ever technically and were graded purely on what seems to be wether the lecturure liked them or not. Film and video, correct me if I am wrong suggests that we’d actually film things. But no, I’ve spent my time at my desk attempting to write essays that I find impossible to be interested in when the films are from years and years ago. And, call me closed minded but a film that has no continuity and has so many things wrong with it cannot and should not be classed as an ‘amazing’ film nowadays. Yes, it may have been a great film at the time, but this is years and years on from that. If I submitted a piece of work like some of the films we’ve been made to watch I’d of been shot down and probably failed. Although, the things these lecturures have made themselves… Well, maybe they’d weirdly love it!

I suppose I’m not so bothered yet about the fact that it has cost £3,000+ yet, because i don’t have to start paying it back yet. But when I do, I’m gonna feel completely resentful. And yet, I know I’ll stay in University because ultimately this is what I am interested in and there is no way I will drop out have nothing else to do. I feel so stuck. So, apart from feeling the need to rant at tumblr, I am still in no way better off. I will stick out these next few weeks in university and then hopefully I’ll have some time to think about my options, which currently stand at - drop out and do what? Or stay and feel unhappy… Oh the joys of growing up.